Yesterday, I had this customer come in. Before that, I had some people who were Mexican that I cashiered for. They’ve come in before, and I’m from California, so I always speak what minimal Spanish I can or at least try to.
This older man says to me as they’re leaving, “They should speak English. They’re in America.” Exactly like a Fox News talking point.
I told him I was from California and I spoke both Spanish and English.
He looked at me and said, “And what a shithole that is.”
Everybody wonders why people don’t want to work retail. This is the kind of thing we’re having to deal with. It used to be just customers being rude. But it’s completely different now.
I’ve given up hope of ever being liked. I don’t know that I will ever get to a point to where I will have people care about me. So instead, I’m just going to write my truth.
This is America, 2026. But it was also America in the 2010s. The 90s. The eighties. So on and so forth.
This has been America since Washington existed. Since England first sank her teeth into her and shredded her apart.
I’m not liked where I live. I’m a know-it-all. I’m a bitch. I can’t let things go. Maybe I don’t want to let things go.
Who knows.
Maybe you’re some English lit student in a class room in 3050, reading this blog post. Trying to understand life in Trump’s America from the perspective of someone who has people say every day, “Oh, that’s an unusual name. Where’s it from?” to the point that it drives her crazy.
Cambria. That’s my real name. Diana is a pen name. I’m not using the real one right now because of family stuff. But I’ll get it back.
It takes everything in my power to say, “Cambria is the Romanized version of Cymru, the Welsh Gaelic name for Wales. It’s also the name of a ship in the 1800’s that took Frederick Douglas to Ireland to raise money for anti-slavery movements.”
But instead, I smile and give the answer, “It’s a place in California.”
Of course, being from California is just enough to make them not like you. I’ve had it happen so many times. And still, I’m just supposed to smile. But I love California, and I always will.
With Love,
Diana/Cambria
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