Last night, Michael B. Jordan celebrated his Oscars win at In-N-Out, which is the most California kid thing he could have done. It made me happy, because recently, it seems like Hollywood is particularly unattainable. Every time you read about an actor, it turns out they’re a nepobaby, related to someone with money or someone from the industry. I grew up in California but have lived out of state since I was twenty-one because of family and haven’t had a chance to make it back.
It wasn’t until my thirties when I admitted to myself that I really did want to work in Hollywood. Which makes sense, given that one of my earliest memories is watching my dad’s horse get fitted for the beast costume in Stargate. My parents weren’t movie people, just friends with a guy who worked with animals for the movies and recommended their horses for the part.
So, I grew up with a healthy appreciation for movie magic. But it wasn’t until last year when I saw Sinners that I thought about wanting to give it a try. I had hoped that maybe I would write a book, get published, and be able to enter the film world that way. But the longer I was out of state, the harder becoming a person in film looked.
And talking about movies was hard for me. What if I found out an actor or a director was an abuser? Could I honestly promote their work? It’s something that frequents my mind probably too much.
But watching Sinners last year, I was working at the movie theater, and something about it reset me. I have a learning disability, and I applied through my local vocational rehab for school funding, and they are funding my bachelor’s degree which is English with a concentration in screenwriting. I’m hoping to be able to write films that mean something to people, to cast actors that have actual talent, and work with creatives that actually care about what they make.
Watching Ryan Coogler work on Sinners in the behind-the-scenes footage, and hearing him talk about the film, it was so clear he cared about every single part of it. Including how it looked visually. Even there, he took strides to make sure there was inclusivity in his work, and I really hope that if I get into the industry, I can be like him.
Detail oriented and opening up doors for people who deserve to be there that wouldn’t get the chance otherwise. Because Hollywood should be about people like Michael B. Jordan, a kid from Oakland, CA, celebrating their big win at In-N-Out. And people need more moments like that to believe in, especially right now, as things seem terrible.
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